Horrorscopes
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Dec 22-Jan 19
The Celestial Parsnip

Jan 20-Feb 17
The Cow of Heaven

Feb 18-Mar 19
Wezen the Double- Headed Kangaroo

Mar 20-Apr 19
Gahoolie the Vase of Tulips

Apr 20-May 20
The Knotted String

May 21-Jun 20
Two Fat Cousins

Jun 21-Jul 22
Mubbo the Heyena

Jul 23-Aug 22
The Flying Moose

Aug 23-Sep 22
The Suggestive Gibbon

Sep 23-Oct 22
The Perhaps Gate

Oct 23-Nov 21
The Small Boring Group of Faint Stars

Nov 22-Dec 21
Okjok the Salesman

Horrorscope Front Page

Not your ordinary horoscopes that you get on spherical planets, oh no, these are genuine Disc horrorscopes, not even attempting to make people feel optimistic ( maybe since they have no weekend papers to sell on the Disc ). Find out your sign and the months predictions

Because of the obvious difference in the stars relative to a flat rather than spherical planet, there are some difficulties in translating Disc zodiac to Earth. The entire Disc Zodiac has sixty four signs, but A'Tuin is constantly moving through space, and the Disc Year is also roughly twice as long as ours (800 days barring freaks of magic, nature, reality- the usual stuff that means, occasionally, that afterwards people are more concerned about where and what they are before when). This means that, at present, only twelve signs can be applied to Earth without seeming just plain silly.